Face it. Shit is getting real. There is food everywhere but not a single sheet of bog loaf for sale on the east coat. What the fuck is with you people. How clean does your dot have to be? While you're hunkering down in your fortress of shit tickets, I'm gonna be pointing my shiny as fuck firearms at you silly muppets while I make with your useful shit and and burn your remaining TP to spite you.
1. Warren G ft. Nate Dogg - Regulate
It needs to be here. If you're going out you want go hearing Nate Dogg bust out the most soulful shit you've ever heard - while keeping it gangsta as fuck at the same time. I reckon it's more of a Nate song if I'm to voice a potentially controversial opinion. RIP in peace homie. We'll all see you soon.
2. Dexy's Midnight Runners - Come On Eileen
This song is ok. Probably wouldn't make Al's top 100 but replace "Come on Eileen" with "COVID-19" and hilarity ensues. Fun for the whole family. Could make the difference between you riding this out or stabbing your kids for the last square of 2 ply.
3. Mike Ladd - Easy Listening for Armageddon
Who the fuck is this cooked unit? We at the HTMG are unsure of where this even came from but have a listen. He's got crackers and everything so at least you'll go out with some tunes AND some fucking JATZ.
4. Nasenbluten - I Feel Shit
If you don't feel shit already put this soul crusher on. Always been in my top 10 sick day songs so it deserves to be here. I'm fairly confident Nasenbluten hate you and hope you die from this shit.
5. Guru Josh - Infinity
It doesn't have to be the 1990's to be time for The Guru. If the end is nigh, get a fuck-tonne of bikkies, knock back like 45 a day till you die of something completely unrelated to the virus. The Guru went out in true Guru style. Gurning to death at Ibiza like a right geezer. Do like the guru, why not.
We at the Hectic Terry Media Group, will be here throughout this national emergency which is a terrible burden on us so please consider donating to our bake drive. Please sent lots of Bitcoin to the following address. It's worth fuck all now anyway.